I can't go back to see her due to UTs.. Was quite worried. I ask mummy the situations and mummy told me alot of things. I felt angry. Typical family problems like the tv shows.. I guess there's always someone like this in the family... Well, enough of that.
Grandma was rather stubborn. She didn't want to take the walking stick which was bought for her last year. Guess old people are the same ya? They just don't want to admit that they need this things to aid them. Suddenly I felt that it's something like a inheritance? Mummy was stubborn too? And I'm very stubborn in someways or rather many ways. Haha!
Well, I was worried. Went back to grandma's house last night to visit her, because I was constantly asking mummy if we can go tonight? I'm not free tomorrow and I can't go back to see grandma.. Yes, so we went back last night just for me to see grandma. But as someone who don't know how to express myself towards feelings, I didn't show much of my care and concern. At least I know that she's fine after seeing her. When I stepped in, she is full of laughters and joking. She knew that I was eating a little and sometimes skipping my meals. So when she saw me drinking water from my bottle, she said me. She said that I don't eat rice, now hungry and keep drinking water. In fact, I was rather thirsty. Haha! And I didn't eat dinner that night, was too tired. But still, I told her that I ate already. :)
I don't know how to be expressive towards my feelings. I'm not that type, you will know if you can read me.
I went for meeting in the morning. Well, it was quite a long one. Aggressive? We've to make the right decision. I may have choose the solutions which many didn't choose. Why I choose so? I felt that the times have changed, we can't always stick with the old protocol. We will have to always move up with time, with all the changes, and think of new strategies to overcome it. That's really what I've always learn in school. If the new strategy would have positive benefits in long run, yes, I would.
When ask if I can commit. My answer, yes, I can commit. But I don't want to commit without a passion. To be frank, my passion is really running low. I don't want to do things for the sake of doing, cause I know I won't be content. I won't be happy afterall.
Judging from yesterday, I guess there's no more chance.
