Today i google-d it and found out something.
True Friendship - Recognition
How can we find true friendship in this often phony, temporary world? Friendship involves recognition or familiarity with another's personality. Friends often share likes and dislikes, interests, pursuits, and passion.
How can we recognize potential friendship? Signs include a mutual desire for companionship and perhaps a common bond of some kind. Beyond that, genuine friendship involves a shared sense of caring and concern, a desire to see one another grow and develop, and a hope for each other to succeed in all aspects of life. True friendship involves action: doing something for someone else while expecting nothing in return; sharing thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment or negative criticism.
I learnt from it. And i also found this from somewhere.
"Before you think friends are important, first think are you important to them? It's true good friends that will be forever by your side."
This is my story.I always thought that it was the best friendships with them, and it'll last forever. But somehow it seemed wrong to me. Perhaps, the 10years of their friendship which was 4years before me was much more deeper than the 6th year i had with them. In many situation, i felt that i was an extra. In order to feel that i'm together with them, often, i will say, 'hey what you all talking, share leh'. If not, i'll move my head nearer to hear the conversation. And recently, i'm tired of doing all these to feel that we are together. I choose to keep quiet and be aside. Thinking that they will know that they left me out. In many situation i feel this way. Just like during 1 day on december last year, they were joking happily and i don't even know what was actually going on. So i decided to stay aside and keep quiet. One of them said that she was tired of asking me what was wrong. And i now answer, i'm tired to doing the things that i used to do before. No point doing something that you didn't like, right? The 4 years more of friendship they had together before me was more deeper. Perhaps. Yes, i felt this way.
There was once, i asked for help. 1 of them said that she can't because she thinks that the higher level put more hopes on her. At that point of time, i asked myself, what is this kind of friendship? Isn't friends suppose to help each other when they need help? But it also depends on the situation and others. When apology is made, do you know that you had already hurt someone. Do you know that i teared because of this? Because i felt helpless, and blaming that i shouldn't that such responsibility in the first place. You then explained. Because yours was more senior, so it meant it's difficult? Let me ask, what about mine? They have more competitors than yours. Isn't it more difficult? Yours had experiences, when mine are still novice. How can i transform them to an expert within the limited days i had with them? And i started to suspect this friendship. People do change, when their environment change. I guess, there may be some one who had explain to you and you then realize that you had misunderstood the meaning of managing your own things. When i was helping to find something, just because i'm serious and lost about the missing item, you said that i'm throwing temper. How could i be happy about what you said? At that point of time, mine didn't did what i've expect how well my morale can be? It's also non of my business and i can don't bother about it and sit down and relax. But because i care for the missing item, i decide to help and find. It's not mine after all. Credits don't go to me. To tell you the truth, i still feel empty from the day till now.
Same thing when 1 of them asked me what's my aim for that day, i replied, you have to plan for yourself. I didn't meant to draw a clear line between us. The meaning behind it was just to let you know that you have to plan for yours base on the standard and it should be done beforehand. I've put more attention on them is because, you still have another person who can come down and help while i don't. You said that you are more biased, but before you decide, did you think of the outcome? You kept saying that you can't be split into 2 pieces, but i didn't want to split you into 2. I didn't blame you for not asking me along. But this do really made me feel more out-casted. But i know that you wanted time for her also. When i get to know that you initiate to meet up with her, then you said lets meet up. I don't know how. I felt that it's because you know that i know that you meet up with her, then you wanted to meet up with me.
I'm a very egoistic person. I can't afford to lose and i may get jealous at times. What one of you said was right, if i don't like, i can really change to another person. But on certain parts of this, it's the past. I've choose to do the things that will benefits. Maybe your will feel that all above is what i thought. But it's all what i felt. And, I should thank you all for able to tolerate me over the past few years.
Perhaps, the next time we meet, we'll be awkward.
Will this friendship last to eternity?
